How I learned to let go of control

ONE IDEA FOR YOU TO THINK ABOUT

How often do you catch yourself trying to control things? If yes, you are not alone.

I used to be a self-proclaimed "controller." I felt overwhelmed by so many things, and it made me feel stuck. But then I discovered one powerful tool:

Drawing a clear line between what I can control and what I can't.

For example:

I can control:

↳ The attitude I come with (my energy).

↳ The boundaries I set. 

↳ My perspective and mindset.

But I can't control:

↳ How others respond.

↳ Others opinions. 

↳ Their actions.

This realization has been life-changing. I feel less stressed, more focused on what truly matters, and more present.

(As I write this, I’m on a plane that’s been delayed for four hours. The "old me" would’ve been furious, huffing and puffing, super frustrated.

But now, I’m focusing on what I can control: my perspective (I’m lucky to be going on this trip), my attitude towards fellow travelers, and my energy.

And I’m letting go of what I can’t control: a thunderstorm in Florida and Delta’s delay process.)

TWO QUESTIONS TO ASK YOURSELF

1. What areas of your life are causing you the most stress or anxiety, and how much of that is tied to things beyond your control?

2. How would your life change if you shifted your energy from trying to control the uncontrollable to focusing entirely on what you can control?

ONE EXERCISE FOR YOU TO TRY THIS WEEK

This week, try this 4-step process for letting go:

1. When you feel stressed or overwhelmed, pause and take a few deep breaths.
2. On a piece of paper (or your phone), write down what you can control and what you can’t. This step is about becoming aware.
3. Pick ONE THING you can control, like your energy, and focus on it for 24 hours. Really concentrate on it.
4. For the next 24 hours, consciously release what you can’t control.

I use this process when I feel overwhelmed, and it helps me regain balance.

If you want to take it a step further, try the effective "Spheres of Influence" exercise. 

Remember, we’re all doing our best. I hope this exercise brings you some relief. Let me know how it goes!